AMEN to no yelling today. This day was very relaxing and nice. I didn't have to yell or raise my voice at all. It was so nice.. the only thing i didn't like about the day is my son thought it was okay to play on the computer.. and so did someone else in my house. The one who wears the pants. Not sure if that is Lukas or My husband but it was both today. He was calm and did some chores. It's hard to get him to do chores but i did have to bribe him. He might have said no a few times but it was not with an attitude. He even went to VBS without having a huge fit. I am just glad it was a new day and we are starting over. It's a new beginning.
I know God brings people into our lives for a reason and sometimes i do feel like I am alone and pushed in the back corner. It is hard to make an effort when no one else does sometimes. I am really glad that God brought someone in my life that understands what i am going through not only with my child but hormonally. This person has been through it too and gets it. She knows how to talk to me and how to help me figure out things to do and say. I know i need help and have been dealing with things for a long time. It just took this one person help me. Again GOD brings someone into your life to help you come closer to him..
I also have a small group of women who I know are always praying for me thinking about me and they know who they are. They knew how to help me and what i was going through. I thank God so much for them too.
It has always been hard for me to keep friends. I had a friend and then they got another friend and would never call back and it made me feel alone. I have felt that way and still do but i know that if i get some help i will be happy and not so angry all the time. I hate the way i feel all the time i hate the way people make me feel. I hate that having depression all these years has done that to me. It makes me angry and sad. Yes I have been through a lot of crap deaths, marriage first born having a heart condition surgery at 13 days old. God got me through it all.
God has helped me with so much. I always put everything in his hands and trust that he will get me through it if i don't worry about it. I think everyone needs to talk. It's am not complaining I just need to get things out. I know i will always have one friend to count on and that is GOD. Sometimes you do need more than that though. Just so you know the commercial about depression are so right and i never knew i had it and hearing the commercials made me think...wow that's me. It really does help to get things off your chest.
I will always keep close to my heart
I will do all things through christ who strengths me.
I said that scripture at my mothers funeral because it was something that kept me going
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